jk8189's Trying To Conceive Wish

Every month I try so hard not to think about getting pregnant or wishing to be pregnant already, in hopes that i will end up pregnant. But every month I end up losing faith in myself. I end up feeling like a failure, that I can not even become pregnant. I end up beating myself. I am becoming increasingly more convinced that the one thing i want, i will never ever be blessed with. I just wish, just once that maybe i can be one of the lucky ones. I just wish it could be my turn....