I don't like my period!

I hate the bloating, I hate the weight gain. I hate the feeling of fat days and that none of my clothes fit right! I hate that I get so irritable! I have tried drinking tons and tons of water or taking pills for bloating and NONE OF IT WORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I wish I could make it go away and never come back.

There were many times in my adult when I longed to see that red spot. That was 7 months ago, now I wish it would go away. I want a baby. Each time I start, I feel like a failure. It is a red flag to me. A reminder that I will not be a parent anytime in the next 9 months. A signal to tell my spouse that he will not be a dad soon. I would like to say farewell to something I once welcomed in my life. Time to go bye-bye. Now would be good.

I hate the cramps definetly and when the flow is heavy. The first 3 days are the worst. Once the cramps have subsided then it is bearable but still uncomfortable. I mostly use tampons, my mom made me use pads when I was in school and I hated them. They were big and bulky and uncomfortable and I had to sit upright in the chair otherwise if I sat back it would leak through my clothes and that is so embarrasing.

I have PCOS and my period is very irregular. I went about 8 months without a period. When I finally got my period back it lasted about 2-3 weeks. Then around the 17th of May I got my period and it never went away!!

Sometimes I would have a day maybe two without or with so little I didn't need protection. I finally decided in July to go to the OBGYN to try and have it stopped. After 4 visits the doctor gave me Provera. He told me to take 10mg for the first 10 days of each month and it should help regulate my periods. I started on August 1st. My period stopped. Then on August 5th it started back again, and by August 9th it hit with a vengence! On my worst day I used 10 feminine products. Sometimes 2 at a time. I use super+ Tampons and Night pads. I am so sick of this I am about ready to call the doc to have him just stop these things all together. If I didn't want kids so badly I would. It is now August 18th and I am still on a very heavy flow! So it isn't about the hassles, the cramps, the bloating, or using protection back to back to back. It is just plain out being on this NEVER ENDING PERIOD!!!

I wish I could get shot and never have it again. The week before I craze salt and vinegar, then it goes to chocolate, then I'm a bitch from hell. I can be so nice then snap. I'm bloated, forgetful, easily frustrated. Forget about sex, one week before I'm feeling like crap, then I'm on it for five days, then I cramp days after. What did I do to deserve such crap. I'm 37, when does it end? I think I'd rather have a hysterectomy then a period.

I don't mind my actual period much, bleeding is practically no hassle at all since I got a menstrual cup. It's the PMS that does me in, particularly the depression and the breast pain.