SAHM or Working Mom?

I do not have any children yet but my husband and I are currently trying for our 1st baby and I want to be a stay at home mom. My mother was home with my sister and I and she took us to school, sports and was there when we came home to help with homework. I can not think of anything else as rewarding as being able to spend the early years with your children.

I have been a stay at home mom since my son was about 15 months old. I worked for about a year after he was born and that didn't go so well. For one I was on a treatment for Lupron and was an emotional mess. And for 2 I just didn't like to working I loved being at home with my son. I know have a little girl too and I just don't see myself working in the near future unless I absolutely had to. I am going to college to feed my brain a little and to have something to fall back on. I love staying with the kids it is one job that I can say that I am great at.

I did stop working outside the home when our first son was born and I have been home for a little over 4 years now but I am very careful not to judge those who are working. My husband and I always knew that was what we wanted to do and we were able to make the budget sacrifice and still put food on the table and a roof over our heads. It has not been easy-- neither decision is really-- but I wanted to be home instead of having someone else raise them. There are many days I would love to go back to work but I don't think that would make the challenge any easier. The most important thing for me is setting boundaries with the kids so I have mommy time and they have time with me too (but it is not easy). We have to have outside activities so we can both socialize and there are many days I am ready to go back to work. I need that support. I also have to spend time with the Lord and read my bible and have prayer time so I can recharge. Otherwise I will snap. It has been a growing experience and just like with any growth, it can be painful but it is worth it. I would recommend it to anyone and find a way to make it work for you. It may not look like the family next door but your children will be happy to have you home. My mom worked as long as I can remember and I missed her not being at home, even when I was in high school. She did not have to be perfect and I knew she loved me, I just wanted her to be there when I left for school and when I got home.

I wanted to be a SAHM so bad. After we found out we were having a second child it made no sense for me to work just to pay a sitter. So I became a SAHM. After 10 months of being a SAHM, I had to go back to work. I missed adult conversation. I needed that little break from the kids. I missed the whole work environment. I have no regrets for trying it, but I would never go back to being a SAHM.

I had a thriving upward moving career prior to getting pregnant. When I fount out I was pregnant I started to pack up the office and move home full time to get used to it. It helped that we were doing up the house at the time and I was fully occupied with builders, plumbers and the like and since having baby T I've been a full time stay at home mom.

Anyone who waxes philosophical about the non stop happy lovely mommy-baby time is not living in reality. I'm finding it hard to balance all the needs of baby with house and at the same time a good wife... it's difficult to do that, add on working and my head might implode. I've left the dirty dishes in the sink one too many days and the trash still needs taking out. It's not easy ... and not for the faint-hearted either.

Although I'm not perfect (nor do I strive to be) in any of my duties, we try, to find balance where we can. And it helps that my husband is understanding of the demands of a 10 month old, without his understanding I would have long lost my mind.

We do believe that it's better for our child (and in the future children) to have a mother who's at home during these crucial first years. And as they grow and find independence, I too can regain some of my own again.

When we decided to have children we understood we needed to sacrifice. Leaving my job to stay at home has afforded me many luxuries and it has limited me in many other aspects ... life is best in balance and motherhood, in all its forms, is only really successful in the balance you can give to yourself and your kids.

I have been a SAHM for the last 18 months. Our daugther was born premature and it was benefical for one of us to stay home with her. Over the last 18 months, I have been able to become active in my older daugther's school, complete my BA and start my MBA. Over the next year I plan to start a business from home. My family has hot meals daily and we spend more time together. I have no regrets for my decision.
I would stress to any SAHM...stay focused, manage your time and enjoy the time you have with you child.