Men, Meet Menstruation!

I would say think of eating a thanksgiving dinner in a wet bathing suit while someone beats on your already stuffed stomach....ALL DAY LONG!!!

I don't have many fond memories of middle school, but this is one of them. My history teacher always allowed students into her classroom at lunch time for tutoring, etc. This one day there was this kid doing a project for health class, and he said something along the lines of "I keep seeing references to PMS and I have no idea what it is..." And my teacher explained it very tastefully, which caused this boy to say, "Hmmm, I guess they call it pre-menstrual syndrome because Mad-Cow Disease was already taken." And my teacher screamed at him to get out. She didn't say anything hurtful, but finished "Don't come back in this classroom unless you're going to respect women!" I was so impressed, and I'm sure wherever that kid is, he remembers it.

I guess what I'd most want to impress on men is the idea that this is like getting sick once a month. How would they feel if they had to deal with a cold or stomach bug every 28 days? And since emotional roller coasters can accompany almost any part of your cycle, you can never really count on your mood.

Though he may not UNDERSTAND what it feels like, he does get the fact that I am not in my usual good mood during my special days, that I ache, and that my food cravings are insane. He gets it...so, he stays out of my way, and the only time he comes near me is to ask if I'm ok, to bring me my heat pad, and to ask me what I want HIM to make for dinner. And yes, ladies, I know I'm blessed. Most men don't know how to react to what they don't get. But mine has just learned what to do, even when he's not sure of what he's doing.

I compare PMS to what I refer to as MANSTRATION. My bf gets really gassy and bloated from time to time and tells me it feels like a knife is in his stomach; therefore, I was like that is great honey now you know how women feel when they have menstrual cramps (except it is most likely ten times stronger and last longer as well).

Another observation that I have made is that men do not need to know all the exact details describing your cycle, emotions and physical aches and pains. All they need to know is exactly how you feel in a short,honest and blunt way. For example, I feel as if there is a knife in my stomach or I feel really emotional today and leave it at that. I have noticed that most men stop listening after the tenth word anyway, so why waste your time and theirs. If you feel like you need to say more write it down so you don't have to repeat it.

Every time I would tell my husband I had it, I always got sort of a blank look, and finally I said, "Do you really know what it means when I say I have my period?" and he finally admitted he didn't. So I just gave him the basic physiological explanation, complete with a vivid description of cramps ("Feels like someone is constantly kicking you just above the bladder area"). Having now described physically what I go through, it helps him be a lot more sensitive to why I'm curled up in the fetal position and not wanting to be touched at all about once a month.

Men will never get it, but what they need to do is respect the fact we get it, and take it seriously! I hate it when men trivalize the issues women face by cracking jokes about PMS or rolling their eyes when women complain about cramps. We are on a hormonal rollercoaster constantly. What our bodies go through is amazing and stressful. It is also complex, and what makes the human race able to continue. Women need to demand more respect for feminine traits (including our cycles), but I don't expect men to understand what it feels like to be hyper emotional or to have a lining of tissue shed from inside your body. They won't get it ladies!